Well Uncle Sam, you can go fuck yourself. I’m getting up out of this bitch.
As you might have heard over the past couple of weeks, Ms. Müller recently applied for a tourist visa to come to the U.S. to spend a few months with me. And you also might have heard that said visa application was denied.
While the American government might have won the battle, they certainly haven’t won the war. While they apparently gave more than ample consideration to the ridiculous notion that Ms. Müller might have defected to our great nation, they failed to take into consideration was my extensive collection of frequent flier miles and my propensity for jumping on airplanes to fly around the world with little or no notice.
When the visa got denied, I almost immediately started working with my boss, who was incredibly kind to work with me, to figure out a way we could maneuver a mutually beneficial trip to Germany. So here I am, back at DIA on my way to Frankfurt. I got a one-way ticket to Germany for about 100 bucks and a meager 30,000 of my 200,000 miles. I’ll spend the rest of this week and the following two on vacation hanging out with Ms. Müller and her crazy family. While I will have to endure a shitload of sarcasm and more German than I can take, there will be no power plants at all, and I think that’s a pretty fair trade. Then, I’ll put in a week or two of work in the area before a brief layover at home.
Yes, those impersonal bastards at the immigration offices dealt me a pretty good blow, and it took a week or two to come to terms with it. But I suppose it’s a just setback, and to be trite as shit about it, all things worth having are worth fighting for. So with an anchor I pulled up years ago, and an extensive collection of loyalty program and credit card benefits, I have some options. And I plan to explore them.
After she has a semester or two of college under her belt, those bastards might be more easily convinced that Ms. Müller will in fact return to Germany, and as such they ought to be more amenable to giving her permission to enter this exalted land. And, in the mean time, I’ve done my homework, and several universities in Germany offer MBA programs in English, and I could afford them. There might be an opening for a semi long-term position in Germany at the Company to be Named Later. If nothing else, I can fly myself back and forth to Germany 3 more times before I have to spend a penny, and that’s if I stop flying today, which we all know won’t happen.
So today, I’ll be flying to Germany of my own volition for the first time (by the way, bloody mary’s seem to cost more today, for some reason), and I’ll do my best to enjoy the shit out of the next couple of weeks. After that, who knows. I sure as hell don’t. But I do know that this thing ain’t over.
Don’t be a stranger.